Wednesday, June 15, 2011

How to Win the Stanley Cup, or, How I'm Pimping My Friend's Superhuman Powers to the Highest Bidder

UPDATE = Read Patrick's version here. It's a superior telling.

For several years now, I've gone on Sharks road trips all over the continent. It's a rewarding hobby, especially when I get to take friends who've never seen a game outside of the HP Pavilion (Shark Tank). One such amigo that I've had the pleasure of traveling with is my buddy Patrick.

Smile for the camera, Patrick... ok, a smug look will suffice. (Photo taken in Chicago, November 2009)

I actually met Patrick in Chicago, since we're both members of a Sharks blog and wanted to be in the Windy City for Jeremy Roenick Heritage Night. Fun game, despite the Sharks losing in O.T. It was Patrick's first road game ever, and it would be his only one of the season.
Funny enough, or "coincidentally," the Chicago Blackhawks ended their massive Stanley Cup drought at the end of that season. We didn't think too much of it at the time, other than "crap, they went through San Jose to do so."

Patrick in Boston, February 2011

Fast forward a season, to February 2011. Patrick and I headed as far east as you can go in the NHL, to Boston. This time around, the Sharks won the game 2-0. A very fun weekend. Again, this was Patrick's only road game of the season. We joked at the time that if the Boston Bruins won the Stanley Cup this year, Patrick had a strange, wonderful gift.

Well, wouldn't you know it, the Boston Bruins did indeed win the Stanley Cup this evening, ending their 39-year drought. And I am beyond convinced that Patrick is indeed a superhuman. Where's Stan Lee when you need him?

Where exactly am I going with all this? So glad you asked.

You see, the economy has soured a bit over the past couple of years, and Patrick and I are not immune. Times are rough, yet hockey tickets are still absurdly high (esp. in Chicago and Boston). Yet we still want to get our road fix in this coming season... the problem is we need to start financing now.

So without further ado, in my capacity as Patrick's representative / agent, I'm pimping his Stanley Cup good luck services to the highest bidder.

To qualify, you need to be a fan of a team that the Sharks will visit next season. Sorry Habs / Senators fans, the Sharks won't be back in your towns until the season after next (although we're accepting advance bidding now!). We have yet to test outside of the Original 6 spectrum, but we'll still consider offers. Dejected Toronto Maple Leafs fans should look no further than us for a good luck charm to bless their upcoming season.

In exchange for a bid that meets our traveling and hockey viewing needs, Patrick pledges to follow the pattern set forth the past two seasons =

1. Sit in upper level seats (stupid price gouging in O6 markets...); as much as we would prefer lowers, we're doing this for you, super fan.
2. Refrain from visiting any other foreign arenas during the season, save for the HP Pavilion.
3. Stay in swanky hotels found via Hotwire.

Please contact Patrick at his sexy blog, or send me your info in a comment here at BBB. Operators are standing by.

Detroit Red Wings fans need not apply.

Cause we're the two best good luck charms that anyone can have...

1 comment:

ZeroIndulgence said...

Man oh is a terrifying and powerful gift. I might have to go back and put pictures into my blog, you know, as proof.