Saturday, October 2, 2010

Death to Car Thieves, or, I Got My Car Back

On the morning of Sunday, September 12, I discovered that my Honda Civic had been stolen outside my residence in suburban San Jose. It wasn't until Friday, October 1, that my vehicle was recovered. The good news = the car wasn't stripped, as I imagined it would be. The bad news? See below.
First of all, my hubcaps were stolen. I really, really hate the look of cars that don't have hubcaps, so I went out today and purchased a new set for $23. Psychologically, the theft of the hubcaps has affected me more than the larger missing items. Clearly I was dealing with a sick individual that would find it necessary to remove the hubcaps while leaving the car mechanics intact. Oh, he also took the car registration and either lost it or destroyed it.

This is where my car stereo once was. Sniff... but I knew it wouldn't be there anyways. The insurance should pay for all $200 of it, anyhow.


I really wanted to know who stole my vehicle, and I had a name = Jeffrey Moran, age 34. He was suffering from a parasite of some kind, and had all kinds of sickening medical stuff in the trunk of my car, including cases for stool samples. Not coincidentally, he and the vehicle were apprehended outside the Valley Medical Center.

Jeffrey was living inside of my vehicle, so it wasn't surprising that there were Cups of Noodles, a toothbrush and razor, and bags of chips.

But eggs? What good are eggs if you're homeless? I once bought food for a homeless man, and he requested eggs. Is there a sinister undercurrent, or are homeless people really onto something with raw eggs?

Clearly the sheriff's deputies apprehended Jeffrey mid-meal = there was still liquid inside the Subway cup.

Jeffrey left behind some literature.

Including some that suggests he's bilingual.

Mr. Moran is clearly a Jeff Dunham / Achmed the Dead Terrorist fan. I threw the shirt away in disgust.

The fact that we root for the same team is hardly comforting.
After cleaning out the vehicle, I got a car alarm system that disables the ignition upon break-in. While I'm going to be paranoid about car theft for a long time, knowing that the suspect is in custody has made everything a little easier to accept.

1 comment:

Kevyn Hagemann said...

Oh man! So sad to hear that story! For sure you're so mad that day and anyone will feel the same. Next time, you should be more careful in parking your car. Maybe, it would be good that you try some auto theft prevention tips so you could avoid chances of this crime.